Low Buzz Count

Bit of a low buzz count over the last couple of weeks. Perhaps the cold is freezing up the buzz-nodes in the brains of the football commentators, but there has been precious few examples of commentating foolery recently. I cannot imagine this situation will last very long.

"Oh bugger"

'He's idling with intent' - He's goalhanging

'Now they have to do it the hard way!' - The favourite team have let one or more goals in to supposedly inferior opposition.

'He had the confidence to take it on' - He's a greedy bugger

'They are an honest and determined team' - They are dirty and attempt to kick their opponents off the park

'He's very competitive' - He will foul more skillful players mercilessly

And a selection of more golden quotes from the girlfriend -

'Yes! Hit it as hard as you can, THAT is how you play a game with a ball. Just like snooker.' - Upon seeing a free kick hit really hard and blazed over the bar.

'Maybe they're trained like soldiers, you know, indoctrinated - when they see a goal, they can't help but put a ball in it.' - After seeing Gareth Barry pass a ball accurately into his own net.

'Fucking close him down you cocksuckers!'  - Getting overexcited after a player runs past two others and gets a shot off

'Hi Roy! Aww, it's like he doesn't know where he is.' - After seeing a confused looking Roy Hodgson in the crowd for a game.

'Urgh, why do you want to touch him, he's all spangly' - After someone hugs Peter Crouch.